The Special Affairs Officer Goes on an Inspection

“Oh my.”

The Adventurers' Guild Headquarters, located on Aave Island, the island of eternal summer.

Back from her lunch break, Special Affairs Officer Taiche found a letter lying on her desk there and, in spite of herself, let out a small sound.

Another staff member had already thrown away the envelope with the sender's name, but the quirks of the handwriting in the letter were unmistakably those of her grandfather.

Her grandfather's name was...... “Earth Sage” Earthcell.

He was the man who was supposed to be off in Zamago Forest at the moment, posted there as a New Branch Establishment Official.

(I wonder what's wrong. A request for staff? Or has he come crying that he can't take it anymore?)

With a mouthful of tea, Taiche began to read the letter, grinning all the while.

By the way, she meant to turn down both a request for staff and a request to quit.

After all, Earthcell's posting to Zamago Forest was a punitive reassignment.

“Pfft!!?”

But what that letter said was neither of those!

Taiche was so startled she spat out her tea!

But she mustn't soil the letter, so she quickly turned aside and spat out her tea!

The other Special Affairs Officer beside her was drenched in tea and began to tremble in silent rage, but Taiche had no room to care about that!

Because that letter said something unbelievable!

“Foooh~~~! The branch office is done, I tell you!”

That was the very first thing written in the letter.

There was plenty to pick at, like why he needed to write out a shout like ‘Foooh~~~!’, or that he shouldn't put spoken tags like ‘I tell you!’ into writing, but that wasn't the problem.

(The branch office—it's done!? In just a few months!? Really!?)

Moreover, as she read further into the letter, she realized that this was not simply a report that the shell was built.

Her grandfather, New Branch Establishment Official Earthcell, claimed that in this short time he had built a building, a defensive wall and a road inside the demon realm, set up the basics for daily life, and even come up with a specialty product, so that everything was ready for the place to be officially certified as a branch office any time.

“Grandpa worked hard with his friends, I tell you! So, Taiche, hurry on over here and make this an official Adventurers' Guild branch office, I tell you! And if possible, I'd like to stay right here as branch chief, I tell you! Thanks a bunch! Sincerely,”

The letter from her grandfather ended with those words.

There was no ‘Dear’ at the top, yet he had written ‘Sincerely’.

No, never mind that.

“Is it really...... really true......?”

Her grandfather Earthcell was a pervert, but not a man to tell that kind of lie.

She liked to think she knew that much about him.

But even so, it was hard to believe right off the bat.

To build a branch office in just a few months......

(And wait, who are these ‘friends’......?)

As she thought this and lifted the letter, another piece of paper fluttered down onto the desk.

Apparently, it had been a two-page letter.

And on that other page, information about Earthcell's ‘friends’...... or rather, his collaborators, was written in detail.

Looking at the names of those collaborators...... Taiche was struck speechless.

She had an abnormally good memory.

For example, she had memorized all the personal information of every currently registered adventurer.

Additionally, she never forgot names written in reports she had read once.

That was why she was a Special Affairs Officer.

And precisely because she was who she was, she sensed it in an instant.

Hold on, these ‘friends’...... every last one of them is “a pain”.

Taiche finished the work she had on hand as fast as humanly possible, put in for everything she needed, hammered various plans into her head, and then used a teleportation magic circle to fly to the Adventurers' Guild branch closest to Zamago Forest!

◇ ◇ ◇

And now.

“............”

Taiche stood on the well-kept road that cut straight through Zamago Forest, her mouth slightly agape, staring at the base her grandfather had built as it finally came into view through the trees.

An imposing sight, far too grand and functional to have been built in such a short time.

Furthermore, although not in large numbers, people had already begun to come and go.

Even though she had grasped the facts through the letter, seeing it with her own eyes, she couldn't help freezing in surprise.

“Wow, it's an ordinarily impressive base!”

The woman beside Taiche who had breezily offered this ordinary remark was named Yuju.

She was an adventurer Taiche had hired as a bodyguard for this inspection.

Ordinary brown hair, ordinarily tied back in one, her bangs ordinarily gathered and swept to the right.

Dressed in ordinary adventurer's gear with an ordinary sword at her hip, she was an ordinary swordswoman, and yet her adventurer rank was an ordinarily excellent rank 1.

When it came to an inspection by a Special Affairs Officer, it was a simple matter to hire a rank-1 adventurer as a bodyguard on expenses.

By the way, Yuju's epithet was, again, “Ordinary”.

She could do anything ordinarily, and her air was ordinary, so she got the name.

It was hardly an imposing epithet, but since her personal motto was ‘Ordinary is best’, Yuju ordinarily and happily accepted it.

“Um, excuse me.”

Just then, someone called out to the two of them as they stood rooted to the spot in the middle of the road.

Taiche snapped out of it and turned around to find a woman wearing apothecary-looking robes.

She seemed to have just come out of the forest, with bits of grass and vines tangled in her robes.

And the basket on her back was stuffed full of medicinal herbs.

“Is something the matter? Are you adventurers?”

So said the woman, smiling sweetly.

At a glance, she looked like a prim woman apothecary, but her voice was rough from drink.

That alone was enough for Taiche to guess who she was.

This woman was one of the people from that base.

“There's no entry fee or anything for that base, so feel free to go right in. Ah, if you're adventurers, please take note: the branch office there is still only running on a trial basis; you can trade materials, but apparently you won't get contribution points. Do be careful, okay?”

“You're Niese-san, aren't you?”

“Huh?”

Niese, the woman dressed like a priestess, or rather now like an apothecary, gave a violent start at having her name guessed out of the blue.

Ignoring Niese's reaction, Taiche handed Niese a business card with fluid movements, as if she were dealing with an executive of some trading company.

“Pardon me. I am Taiche, a Special Affairs Officer, here from the Adventurers' Guild Headquarters for the certification inspection of that base's branch office. Well, I have various other business as well, but......”

Niese kept looking from the business card she had taken without thinking to Taiche's face and back, blinking in bewilderment, and Taiche cleared her throat once and said:

“For now, would you kindly announce me to New Branch Establishment Official Earthcell?”

Earthcell is amazing.

He writes one letter, and it's a gag.