What She Desires
6. What She Desires
"So, what will you do, Shia? Or rather, what do you want to do?"
Shia tilted her head as she drank the warm milk with a drop of honey that Tori had prepared for her.
"What do I want to do?"
"Well... do you still want to live in this house?"
"……?"
What was Tori trying to say?
"This is your... your father's and mother's house, right?"
"Yes, well, that's true... But if you intend to make a life for yourself here, you'll have to interact with other people to some extent."
"Other... people?"
"That's right. No matter how you look at it, you're still a child, so you'll naturally need the presence of adults to get by in life."
Tori spoke with a slightly troubled expression, resting his chin on his folded fingers with his elbows on the table.
Shia was well aware that she was a child, especially when he put it that way. Therefore, she felt no urge to rebel. And as for the part about interacting with other people, her mother had mentioned that too.
Over the last six months, she had learned firsthand how difficult it was to survive entirely on her own. Still, she felt she had tried her best. Perhaps she had only managed because she had been so tense.
But collapse had been staring her in the face.
First, her food stores had nearly run dry; then, the cleaning of the house had been neglected and dust began to accumulate; the garden vegetable patch was swallowed by weeds, and all but one of her chickens had been killed by wild beasts.
She couldn't say with any pride that she could survive alone. —And yet,
"...Shia is different from other people, so everyone will surely hate me."
"I can't exactly say that's not the case... as a matter of fact. This country is naturally closed-off, and this town is on the frontier. There's likely a tendency here to reject outsiders."
Hearing him confirm it, Shia hung her head. In the end, there was no one who would like her, or love her.
"Is that because Shia is a 'Fallen'...?"
"Hmm? No, that's not it. You aren't a Fallen. Didn't you hear me yesterday? Shia, you're a beastkin. A beastkin child."
"I'm not... the child of Dad and Mom...?"
"I wonder. I've never met the two of them. But the townspeople didn't say otherwise, so your parents probably weren't beastkin."
"I see..."
In other words, Shia was not their biological child.
But she had suspected as much.
Something instinctive within her had always told her that she and the two of them were different creatures.
Seeing Shia sink further into herself, Tori's brows drooped. He hadn't stated it explicitly, but he was likely worried that his words could only be interpreted as "that's right."
However, Shia preferred this over being lied to.
She gave her drooping ears a flick to straighten them and asked the man before her once more.
"Um, the people Tori talked about, the ones who are the same as Shia... where are they?"
"They aren't in this country. They're in another country."
"How can I meet them?"
"Ah, and that brings us back to my original question."
—Which was the "What do you want to do?" Tori had asked her earlier.
"If you'd like, I could take you to that country."
"A country where people like Shia are?"
"That's right. It's quite far from here, so regardless of whether you choose to live here or not, you won't be able to return for a while."
"For a while?"
"If I ask others for help, the shortest trip would be six months. If I accompany you all the way, we might take more detours, so it could take even longer."
Six months—nearly the same amount of time that had passed since she lost her mother. It felt both long and short. And if she refused, it meant she would have to interact with the other people in this town to survive. The very people who had hurled such intense emotions at her yesterday.
Shia lifted her downcast gaze. As expected, she felt no hateful emotions coming from Tori. Meeting her eyes, Tori spoke.
"Well, you don't have to decide right this second. Let's see... I can wait for about a week, maybe by staying in the ruins again."
"The ruins? We can't go in together?"
"Well, that depends on your choice. We might spend some time together for a while, or we might say our goodbyes right here, right now."
"—Ah..."
Shia gasped at those words.
That was right. Just as he said, depending on her choice, this white-haired man might leave this place this very instant.
"Goodbye...?"
I don't want that, her heart cried out. It was strange, considering they had only met yesterday.
From there, Shia's decision was swift.
"I've decided. Shia will go with Tori."
"Eh? You mean you want to meet other beastkin?"
"Hmm?"
Shia blinked at his response.
She had said it because she didn't want to be apart from Tori, but was that what it meant?
Taking her answer as an affirmation, Tori knit his brows slightly.
"You don't have to reach a conclusion so quickly. This is a heavy decision for you."
To this, Shia shook her head vigorously.
"Tori doesn't hate Shia, right?"
"Eh?"
"Shia can tell how other people feel. Everyone else doesn't like Shia, but Tori is different. That's why I'll go with Tori."
"Ah... I see. But, a lot of that was because everyone misunderstood. I think there are people who wouldn't hate you if they saw the real you."
In fact, there are probably some perverts who'd want to keep this child as a pet... Tori murmured in a very low voice. Shia's excellent ears picked up the words perfectly, but since she didn't quite understand the meaning, she ignored it.
"They wouldn't hate me?"
"Yeah."
"That man in black... he didn't hate Shia either..."
"Man in black?"
"The big, black, scary man."
"Ah... Captain Baptiste. He certainly... yeah..."
While looking at Tori, who was smiling faintly for some reason, Shia told him.
"But I still want Tori."
That was the answer her heart had given.
Taking Shia's conclusion head-on, Tori blinked once, then narrowed the corners of his eyes slightly. It was an expression close to a wry smile.
"I suppose it is a bit strange. I'm the one who brought it up, and then when the kid agrees so readily, I panic and try to talk them out of it. ...Alright then."
Muttering as if to himself, Tori gave a light clap of his hands.
"Then, I'll contact a Barrier Master immediately and have them cast a preservation spell on this house."
"...? Barrier Master?"
"Hmm? Ah, it's a type of profession that uses a special power. Shia, do you know what magic power is?"
Shia nodded slightly.
Magic power was something not everyone possessed, but it was very convenient.
Shia herself didn't have any and had never actually seen it, but she had heard bits and pieces from her father and mother. Furthermore, she had heard that the boxes used to preserve food in the house and the stove used for cooking were made by people called Magic Item Makers, who infused them with magic power.
"It's... a convenient thing, right?"
"Convenient... well, I suppose it is. Barrier Masters use that magic power for their work. As the name suggests, they can create barriers, as well as provide protection and preservation. A house quickly falls into disrepair once there's no one living in it."
"Preserve it so it doesn't get bad?"
"Exactly. And we'll need a barrier to prevent break-ins while you're away, yes. And then—"
Tori efficiently discussed the arrangements for leaving the house—such as who to give the remaining chicken to and asking someone to perform periodic check-ins—while Shia, not fully understanding, simply nodded along.
"Is it alright if we depart early?"
When she nodded again, Tori slapped his hand against his palm as if remembering something.
"Is there anything you want to do before we leave? You won't be able to come back for a while."
"Anything I want to do?"
After hesitating for a moment, Shia made one request of Tori.
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